Gender Identity: Female Agency Enters the Equation
The formation of gender in humans is a topic studied by many academic and professional fields. Psychology has done a lot of work toward theories on gender identity via personalities like Sigmund Freud and Jessica Benjamin. Freud looks at the formation of identity as the recognition of difference between the male and female child. In Freud’s Oedipal model, identification with the father and the recognition of physical similarities, by way of penis, creates a tension that results in a break with the mother and idealization of the father. The break with the mother is necessary because the mother is the source of a dependency for the child that will subvert the formation of identity, according to Freud. Benjamin claims, “difference is only truly established when it exists in tension with likeness, when we are able to recognize the other in ourselves.” (Benjamin 169) Benjamin criticizes Freud’s exclusion of the mother as a source of agency for the independence of the child. Benjamin articulates the mother’s role in the attainment of autonomy, adding a missing element to the Freudian Oedipal theories of gender formation, female agency or instrumentality in the mother. We will look at the theories of Freud and Benjamin as they relate to the development of gender identity in the heterosexual male and female child.
According to Freud there is a model of reality that contains 3 components: the id, the ego, and the superego. The id represents our most basic instincts or needs, which according to Freud are hunger, thirst, the avoidance of pain, and sex. The id also represents our wishes and the difference between our wants and needs is called the primary process. The ego represents reality and our consciousness of it. The ego looks for possible ways to negotiate between the self-serving id and the realm of what is actually possible and within the scope of societal allowance. This is the secondary process. The superego is the place of deduction in our minds that store the information on proper behavior and existence based on the two most important people in the world of the child, its parents. There are two parts of the superego, the conscience, they way we punish ourselves, and the ego ideal, the way we reward ourselves. It is in the superego that we see the struggle of the Oedipal man. It is important to understand the stages of development as Freud lays them out to understand the Oedipal crisis.
The stages are oral (birth- approx. 18 months), the anal stage (18 months – four years), the phallic stage (3or 4 until 6 or 7 years), and the latent stage (5- approx. 12 y ears), and finally the genital stage, which represents our sex lives, after puberty. The Oedipal crisis occurs in the phallic stage. Sucking or biting represents the oral stage and the anal stage, by potty training joys and or woes. Masturbation or fascination with genitalia represents the phallic or Oedipal stage. In fact, Freud believes it is the recognition of the difference in genitalia, which comprise the point of tension that begins the process of individuation for the child.
The first love object is our mother because she is closely associated with the breast and the nurturing milk of the breast. The mother is also a love object of the male child specifically when he has realized he has a penis and the male child has identified with the father and seeks to possess the mother the same way the father does, sexually. This is one of the least like theories of Freud because it challenges our Western sensibilities to consciously consider sexual intimacy with a parent. The identification with father causes the break with mother and forms identity for the child. The mother becomes only a vessel for the child’s frustrations after this point; rather Freud would have us believe so. Freud assigns the character of the overbearing mother who would prefer not see her child reach autonomy. Freud asserts that women seek to nurture their children until the children are unwilling and unable to care for themselves because of their over-dependence on mother. Whereas mother is the monster no child wants to emulate, father is the idealized parent that all children wish they could be or be as like as they possibly can.
There are two types of father to be discussed when discussing the Oedipal crisis, the archaic father and the Oedipal father. The archaic father matches the mythical father in Oedipus the King insomuch that he sees the male child as a rival and seeks to have the child eliminated. In the Oedipus model this would serve for the fear of castration because that is the deterrent the father employs to prevent the child from attempting to have sex with the mother. Freud completely disregards this element opting instead for the Oedipal father whose primal tendencies are under control and is viewed more as a protector of free agency than protector of his property.
In the Oedipal model, difference is construed in respect to its binaries. Benjamin calls this gender polarity. The same phallus that stands for difference and reality also stands for power over and repudiation of women. By assuming the power to represent her sexuality as well as his, it denies women’s independent sexuality. Thus, masculinity is defined in opposition to woman; one gender is glorified in favor of vilification of the other (Benjamin 167). At the moment the male child realizes he has a penis and the female child has not, he realizes that he is different and has something, where she is lacking. Freud claims this is the point where the male assumes a superior posture. The male child can now begins to identify with his father. He has apparatus like his father and therefore his father’s power in some small measure.
The problem with the identification with the father is with the male child’s desire to be like the father entirely, just as when he was with the mother entirely in the pre-oedipal stage. In the male child’s eyes the father possesses the mother; the male child desires to possess the mother in the same way. The frustrations lie in the child’s realization that he cannot fully be with the mother in the same way the as the father. The child wants the mother for himself and this puts the child in a position of competition with the father he wants to be like.
This moment occurs in the female child as well. When the female child realizes she has no penis she becomes envious. With this recognition she assigns blame for her shortcomings onto her mother. She identifies with her mother’s condition of being merely female without the much-needed penis. The female feels she needs this penis to be powerful like her father. This need to be like her father is met by the fact that she is like her mother and the disillusionment is the moment of gender identity for the female. The female child has realized she is not male.
Sigmund Freud established psychoanalysis as a credible study with his conscientious pursuit for understanding the workings of the psyche; Freud is not alone is his diligence. Modern psychoanalyst and feminist Jessica Benjamin also seeks to understand the relationships between men, women, gender and identity. Benjamin agrees with the basic Oedipal model but finds it sorely lacking in its representation of the role of the mother in the independence of the child amongst other things.
Benjamin deviates from Freud in several specific areas. According to Benjamin, male subjugation is caused by fear of being reabsorbed into the “engulfing womb”. This means that men are scared if they do not keep their mother at bay she will swallow them whole and they will never become individuals but merely reflections of her all encompassing existence. Benjamin assures us that it is the intense male need to reconnect to the mother that the male feels “violated” by her existence and fears in weakness he will return to her ministrations (Benjamin 164). The male must always fight the desire for mother else he is plagued by feelings of dependency and helplessness. When he is able to displace this desire onto other women, he is able to feel powerful because he can have a mother substitute that both fulfills his sexual desire and his sense of autonomy because this female is not his mother. He retaliates with subjugation as a method of self-defense against the “regressive siren” that would re-engulf him in “female goodness”(Benjamin164).
Mother is the source of goodness for children, the source of life giving milk as well as the provider of every need. When the male repudiates mother for not being male, for not having a penis, he is excluded from his mother as the source of goodness. Whereas his source of goodness was once externally imposed he must now create goodness for himself, internally.
There is an immediate penalty for repudiating mother, more work for the male child who immediately begins to feel his loss.
The female child is no less susceptible to the repudiation of mother and its backlash. The female child maintains some semblance of connection to the mother in her physical similarity to mother but she resents it. This resentment is less traumatic than the male child’s complete denial of mother but it does occur. Because the connection is maintained the female child learns nurturance by virtue of her experience at the hands of the mother she resents. This creates a quandary for the female child; as the mother is both the love object and deficient object sufficient target for displaced feelings of inadequacy because she is not like the father.
Father represents power by virtue of having the penis and fulfills the male child’s fantasy of one day having similar power.
Benjamin asks us to look the relationship between the Oedipal man and his father in the myth of Oedipus the King, the source of the psychoanalytic term coined by Freud, the Oedipal man referring to a man’s desire to kill his father and sleep with his mother. Oedipus is first cast off to fend for himself when he could not; this begins the battle for survival between father and son. The prophecy that Oedipus would kill his father and marry his mother prompted the King (father) to cast Oedipus out in his instinctual desire to survive. Oedipus fled his home when he heard about the prophecy in an attempt to escape his destiny. This point to reluctance in Oedipus to take his father’s place and sleep with his mother, not desire. Oedipus also kills the King without knowing it is his father. This is not the intentional destruction of the father in jealous fever of Freud’s Totems and Taboos. This supports Benjamin’s assertion that the idea of “paternal intervention, in the most profound sense, is a projection of the child’s own desire.” (151) Apparently, Benjamin believes that it is the acceptance of the mother and father as a unit without the child that allows the child to see itself without the parents.
Theory claims father responsible for autonomy and he relegates the mother to the position of the anti-father. In a way Freud not only creates a negative image of the mother and her influence on the independence of her children but his treatment of the omission is suspect in its deliberateness. Benjamin points out the child recognizes he has a penis and the she does not; the child recognizes he is male and she is not, there is no mention of the vagina’s existence or acknowledgement of the female child as a female for its intrinsic value.
Benjamin offers that the mother plays a significant role in the formation of gender identity not just as the antihero but also as a catalyst for the establishment of independence in the recognition of difference in the “identity mirror”. It is the mother in our culture that promotes growth and independence in the child even though in Freud’s model our culture supports male superiority for which the child breaks with the mother.
Benjamin also offers another point of deviation from Freud’s Oedipal model she adds the concept of fecundity envy; this means the male is envious of female fertility. The female ability to feed the child via breast is also envied. The penis envy of the female child is seen as a critical aspect of female feelings of inferiority. Does fecund envy result in the critical aspect of male feelings of inferiority that are manifested in the subjugation of women?
For Freud the fear of physical castration by father is fathers attempt to deter the male child from copulating with the mother, and thereby replacing the father. Even though Freud seems to recognize there is danger for the male child he does not attribute it to an aggressive act by the father toward the child. Benjamin clearly challenges this omission. In the myth, the father was the initial aggressor and Oedipus the reluctant player.
Fear of castration for boys a metaphor in Benjamin’s eyes for fear of being “cut off” from the source of goodness, mother’s nurturing milk. Loosing the connection to the mother subverts the male child’s confidence. This could help explain the competitive nature of the male, as he is always trying to prove himself equal to the father and deserving of the mother.
Conclusion